Family Sleep League (2018 1st season)

The idea is to start a "Family Sleep league". An experiment to see if there is a correlation between good regular sleep and a happier family. I'll save you the suspense there will be.

Also...

1) Whack in a weekly report for each team.

2) Include some universal parental truths. Add feelings of adversity to identify with. Lob in a poignant comment or two and it may become a readable blog?

In about a year I  may even get the odd comment to respond to. In a couple of years this could be a self help group for exhausted Dad's in the East Brighton area.

Who know's could it even become a blog to advertise reduced pepper grinders, discount Cruises or PPI claims! I know,I know, hope is a dangerous thing but we all need to have our dreams.

If it provides no more than an opportunity for someone to take a breather from the numerous plates they're spinning then good. If it's one moment to be held in the idea that you're not alone in sometimes feeling overwhelmed at the responsibility of being a Dad then that's even better.

Ultimately it's one plate spinning parent's perspective to another? Something to read and digest in the time it takes for the kettle to boil or a microwave to ping.

It's also be a way for me to catalogue the seemingly endless supply of "artwork" that comes home daily from 2 sources, lives on the fridge for a week before finding it's way to a recycling bin. 

So here goes...

Team Profiles

I have decided to give each family member a team name. 

"Asleep within seconds Albion"

1) Introducing my 5 year old daughter aka "Asleep within seconds Albion"

"Asleep within seconds Albion" has never really struggled to get to sleep or have good sleep. She was sleeping through the night (7pm to 7am) from about 3 months old. To the satisfaction of my equally "Sleepless in Essex" brother and "Sleepless in Wiltshire" sister who have probably both had to live with limited sleep since about 1996 they were relieved to learn this is definitely not the case with her little brother.

Club emblem
Her club emblem is a pink glittery square badge of a small girl fast asleep under a mountain of stuffed toy unicorns her face stuck on an etch a sketch.

What are her chances in this inaugural 10 week season?

I would be quietly amazed if she didn't win this league with relative ease. The only possible spanner in the works was if she was to get any sort of cough,cold or temperature.Like all children she would then revert back several years and end up sleeping at a 45 degree angle in our bed. My wife pushed onto one edge maintaining a level of balance only previously achieved by Shaolin monks. I would be in my default "the kids are ill" shivering on the sofa under a child's blanket and two damp towels swearing at the dryer doing its "Just making sure you all know I'm still here doing random drum revolutions" 

"Fidgety legs United"

2) Introducing my 3 year old son aka "Fidgety legs United"

"Fidgety legs United" who up to about a fortnight ago could easily have been
"Padding through to Mummy United" Or if born in Spain "Midnight gibberish whispering Athletico" will like his father probably always be plagued with fidgety leg syndrome.
Sleep for my son has always been something on an enigma. 

A long car journey? Yes.

The thin edge of a sofa two minutes before tea time? Absolutely.

The start of the competitvely priced £8.50 showing of Paddington 2 after a kilogram of flumps? Definitely.

Bed at bed time? No chance.

Club Emblem
His club emblem is of a small boy with a low hanging nappy,standing in a lit doorway, holding a toy Owl in one hand and a plastic Terradactyl in the other.

What are his chances in this inaugural 10 week season?

I fully expect to see "Fidgety legs United" stuck in a bottom of the table dog fight with my wife's team. That said the fact that she's pregnant gives her serious guilt tokens with which to throw at me about who should be getting up to get him, milk,a dry pull up,whatever toy has just been posted under the bed. 

I think this first league could be a character building one for him.

"Tired and Emotional Athletic"

3) Introducing my beautiful and talented wife. She probably thinks I am still doing my tax returns,researching Bitcoin or listening to Joe Rogan podcasts. If she does read this blog it will be while also making the pack lunches and brokering a deal about second hand lego.It means I can probably just about get away with calling her "Tired and Emotional Athletic"

Club Emblem
Her club emblem would be not dissimilar to her daughters. A pregnant woman lying on her side,tightly packed in by bespoke pillows that ultimately line her bodies perimeter, as the light from an ipad flickers various offers from "Local Mum's bargains group!" 


What are her chances in this inaugural 10 week season?

In that my son has no clear understanding that Mummy is pregnant and therefore needs more sleep plus the fact that we have an ever approaching due date I think it will be between "Tired and emotional Athletic" and"Fidgety legs United to see who doesn't finish bottom of the table.

"Hiding in the Spare room Town" 

4) And finally introducing the last team in the league, myself, appropriately named "Hiding in the Spare room Town"
"Shivering on the Sofa City" and "On a floor under two dressing gowns" would also have been good names but thanks to my job where I often have to get up at 4am thereby justifying my occasional sleeping in the spare room this is the most accurate name.

Club emblem
My emblem would be of a middle aged half naked man, wearing odd socks, sleeping on the top bunk of the bunkbeds the International School lent us last year.


What are his chances in this inaugural 10 week season?

On previous form he really should finish top or second. The only possible spanner in the works is that he ignores his wife's annoyingly accurate advice about best before dates and eat's those two day over prawns. If food poisoning does strike sleep, along with body fluids and dignity will be eradicated..

Gallery Proxima Generacion

Parjaro confundido

Felt pen and feathers on white paper

21.0cm x 29.7cm

If you've enjoyed this blog, you might like these as well. They might help to pass the time if you find yourself in a lengthy queue, stuck on a train, stuck in a lift, or like me, stuck in an anxious moment.

One man's mission to help develop a universal basic living wage and send some postcards.

http://capitalsfromasouthcoast.blogspot.co.uk/

A man with a relaxed attitude towards sorting the recycling preparing himself for the inevitable rise of artificial intelligence.

inanimatesmayobject.blogspot.co.uk/

© 2018 james macdonald copyright