Nesting is not the same as resting.

A round up of the week's news from our four teams......

Tired and Emotional Athletic was instructed to change venues as the scale of her nesting reached dangerous levels this week. If you stood still anywhere in the house for 5 seconds or longer you were in real danger of being wet wiped unconscious.

This venue change meant that Hiding in the Spare Room Town was no longer keeping very still on a bunk bed but going to bed at 8am in expectation of a 4am match with Fidgety Legs United.

Hiding in the Spare room Town for the unforeseeable future is to be referred to as "Same bedtime as his children Athletico"thought the idea of trying to explain Maslow's Hierachy of needs to his son, e.g "you want warm milk at 2am, you don't need warm milk at 2am!" to be an utterly pointless activity.

For all the warm,cosy feelings these midnight cuddles bring I think the dominant feeling when your sharing a bed with your 3 year old son,12 toy birds and a velociraptor is that it would be great if this person that you had a 40 second cameo role in creating could possibly please "Just shut the '@!k up"

That said I am sure these interactions are probably the ones I will miss and reflect on the most in a decades time.

Sleep Within seconds Albion's ability to sleep through endless shouts for milk and whispered conversations about Owls is fast becoming the stuff of legends.

That said on Tuesday night I had to to move her away from the edge where she was no more than two polite farts away from crashing onto the floor. Whatever dream she was having it made her look like she trying to work out the square root of 48 in Spanish.

When I asked about it at breakfast she told me she had had a bad dream about Peter Rabbit’s Dad being killed by Mr McGregor.She said it had made her feel worried that that could happen to me.

I did explain that, like the flowers,trees, Granny's old dog, one day I would die.

"Hopefully darling it won’t be for a long time."

I also said it was highly unlikely that I would meet my maker from being squashed by a rake while trying to steal a pensioners radishes.

Galleria Proxima generacion

Felt pen and water that's had a half a fish finger dissolved  into it on white paper

21.0cm x 29.7cm

If you've enjoyed this blog, you might like these as well. They might help to pass the time if you find yourself in a lengthy queue,stuck on a train, stuck in a lift,or if you're anything like me, stuck in an anxious moment.

One man's mission to help develop a universal basic living wage and send some postcards.

http://capitalsfromasouthcoast.blogspot.co.uk/

A man with a relaxed attitude towards sorting the recycling preparing himself for the inevitable rise of artificial intelligence.

inanimatesmayobject.blogspot.co.uk/

© 2018 james macdonald copyright

"Parental slaves to you . com"

Team name	week 1	week 2	week 3	week 4	week 5	week 6
AWSA	1ST	1ST
HISR	2ND	2ND
FLUN	3RD	4TH
TAEA	4TH	3RD

Awake within seconds Albion

There was no change at the top of the table with "Awake within Seconds Albion" chalking up another 5 clear nights of 7-8 hours sleep a time. The only minor blip was when I had to wake her on Wednesday night as she had "sleep wriggled" to the end of the bed and was submerged under about 10-15 kilogram of man made fibre.

Fidgety Legs United

On Tuesday following another night of shuttle runs from the hours of 1 to 3am Fidgety legs United was unsurprisingly grumpy at breakfast.

 “Daddy I need a wee!"

"Daddy can you come with me!"

"Daddy don’t look at me!"

"Daddy don’t see me!”

“Okay so just so I am absolutely clear about this.The service you’re requiring from
Parent Slaves to you.com is for me to escort you to the bathroom, with my eyes closed.Stand there facing the wall while you have a wee,still with my eyes closed. Then,still with my eyes closed escort you back to your half eaten bag of quavers and place on the sofa watching Peter Rabbit?"

"Daddy help me wash my hands....Daddy don't see me!!!!!"

Hiding in the spare room Town

Had another week of “probably best you don’t mention it in front of your heavily pregnant and exhausted wife” sleep. If it hadn’t been for rolling over onto a still quite creaky left elbow and yelping myself awake on Wednesday night, I may have challenged “Asleep within seconds Albion” for the top spot. Sadly I possess an elbow joint that understandably isn’t a fan of being hyper extended by Black Belt Brazilian Jui Jitsu practioner. Try saying that after three gins! If you had said to me ten years ago,that aged 41 my most common fantasy would revolve around me sleeping alone in a single bed I am not sure if I would be surprised or a little disappointed at my total lack of imagination.

 Tired and Emotional athletic

Was true to her team name this week and for good reason. An extra 2 days cover at School,a growing baby defying the laws of gravity and a “Mummy Whisperer” who crawls into bed most nights to discuss how much he really likes birds is keeping her at the bottom of the table.

Galleria Proxima generacion

Felt pen and coco pop infused milk on white paper

21.0cm x 29.7cm

If you've enjoyed this blog, you might like these as well. They might help to pass the time if you find yourself in a lengthy queue,stuck on a train, stuck in a lift,or if you're anything like me, stuck in an anxious moment.

One man's mission to help develop a universal basic living wage and send some postcards.

http://capitalsfromasouthcoast.blogspot.co.uk/

A man with a relaxed attitude towards sorting the recycling preparing himself for the inevitable rise of artificial intelligence.

inanimatesmayobject.blogspot.co.uk/

© 2018 james macdonald copyright

No Sleep Till de de dah dah..Thursday.

Team name	Week1	Week2	Week3	Week4	Week5	Week6	Week7	Week8	Week9	Week10
AWSA	1ST
HISR	2ND
FLUN	3RD
TAMA	4TH

As we can see after the first week and true to suggested form it's "Asleep within seconds Albion" on top spot with "Tired and Emotional Athletic" propping up the bottom of the table. 

"Hiding in the spare room" is just ahead of "Fidgety Legs United" both probably at the expense of "Tired and Emotional Athletic."

Let's see what sort of week the four teams have had.

Tired and emotional Athletic

Having at best 4, maybe 4 and a half hours sleep in frustratingly small 45 minute chunks for the majority of the week will be the main reason my wife is currently in 4th place.

Here's hoping homemade cards, a cuppa and the unorthodox Mothers Day gift of a 2 year McAfee anti virus subscription helps put a better perspective on things.Luckily it's common knowledge that nothing says "Darling we all appreciate how awesome a Mum you are, quite as effectively as someone updating your firewalls.

"Happy Mothers day darling. I've treated you to an,anti virus package.There's an anti phishing component that comes as standard!"

"Does a bunch of flowers and a Toblerone come as standard?"

Asleep within seconds Albion

Clear winner of the first week with five sleeps on the trot.

A dose of, “Australian flu” wasn’t nearly enough to stop my daughter having another solid week of sleep. We had heard really bad things about this strain of flu. The symptoms however didn’t include waking up with corks hanging off your nose. A joke utterly lost on my 5 year old daughter. It did however include a sore throat, headache and being at least 20% more emotional.
The sudden realization that "Mr Worry" who reminded her of Daddy just wasn't going to overcome his anxiety by the end of the book caused her to burst into tears.

As the winner of the first week "family sleep league" my daughter was granted a special day out.This "Special day out" resulted in a trip to the library so that Daddy could avoid another fine. Half a paragraph on the loo every other day will do that! A journey into Brighton on the bus followed by a panicky search to find another Library to make up for the one that had closed early for emergency maintenance!

She wasn't fooled.

"Look here's another Library!" 

"Daddy there aren't any chairs or places to sit down,its a shop!"

My parental guilt of being totally rumbled meant her "Special Treat" trip was instantly upgraded. As well as a bus journey and walk in the rain it also included the lion's share of a not really shared at all brownie. A wonderfully overpriced sticker album from the not fallen for Library and a babychino. For anyone who isn't up to speed on current coffee shop decaffeinated alternatives for children it's basiclaly a shot glass measure of hot milk for the same price as 8 litres of milk from the co-op. It has a better mark up than Bitcoin at its peak. 

Hiding in the spare room town 

Hiding in the spare room town was a genuine contender for the top spot until Friday when he woke up drenched and shivering to find someone must have put a boomerang under his pillow.This means that for the first week he is destined for the silver medal.

Fidgety legs United

My son being rewarded with a toy blackbird for sleeping in his bed the week before seems to have utterly backfired on us.I also feel one week’s sleep shouldn’t really equate a new toy.A extra biscuit or a ride on Daddy’s shoulders maybe.

When it comes to rewarding our children I have often been described by my wife as being a bit mean.In a similar way as her advice on the best M25 services,Beaconsfield apparently,sometimes I do probably just need to listen

The most innocent of discussion about plastic toys,second hand or not, reduced by 40% from the 65% they’ve had added on to them or not,can be enough to raise my heart rate to dangerous levels.

My son obviously feels that lying in his bed from 7am until his first traipse through to us at 2am for one night is justification for another toy bird.

He’s presently fixated on a “Birds of New Zealand book” and an in particular an Eagle indigenous to the land.A toy Eagle is what he wants and considers to be a fair swop for waking my wife up who then wakes me up because understandably three hours of whispering bird related gibberish in your ear is enough to break anyone. 

“Can Mummy’s baby be an Eagle?”

“No!”

“Can I be an Eagle!”

“No you don’t have wings!”

“Ca I use my finger wings!”

“William I know this quite possibly means I am failing you as one of,if not your primary role model but I’m afraid i have neither the intellect or energy to effectively answer that question as this time!”

Gallery Proxima Generacion

"Crazy Crazy Breakfast"

Inspired by Paul Stanley aka KISS Starman's cameo appearance in Scooby Doo

Felt pen and cheerio infused milk on white paper

21.0cm x 29.7cm

If you've enjoyed this blog, you might like these as well. They might help to pass the time if you find yourself in a lengthy queue, stuck on a train, stuck in a lift, or like me, stuck in an anxious moment.

One man's mission to help develop a universal basic living wage and send some postcards.

http://capitalsfromasouthcoast.blogspot.co.uk/

A man with a relaxed attitude towards sorting the recycling preparing himself for the inevitable rise of artificial intelligence.

inanimatesmayobject.blogspot.co.uk/

© 2018 james macdonald copyright